How to get beyond depression, anxiety and back to the travel couple we once were.
Let’s face it, the last 2 years have been crap.
It’s been months since we updated our website as we’ve both been battling personal mental health problems and struggling with our work life balance. The last few months has seen me spiral out of control into depression so deep I spent time in hospital on a suicide watch and was not released until specialists were confident that I would not harm myself. I’m so thankful to all of my close friends and family that have surrounded me and show the love that only close friends can give. I am now on medication and regular check ups with my doctor and psychiatrist.
How did I get here? And more importantly how do I get myself out of this self destructive state that seems to be swallowing up nations of people in this global pandemic that has impacted on all of us globally. I’ve come a long way from the guy who only a few months ago was contemplating and planning to end my life.
I don’t want to look back, but the culmination of so many parts collided between work and home life. Then came a moment when I thought I wasn’t good enough and that I was a failure in so many aspects of my life. It’s this moment that I’m now thankful for. That may seem strange to say but in, vocalising my struggle I started on a road of healing and figuring out who I am.
It’s not easy to let go of work and realise that I’m just one person. I’d got myself so caught up in the illusion that I could do anything for everybody and obsessed about ensuring that everyone of my customers came first. It’s a dangerous place to be, putting customers before your own mental heath. Obsessing, not mentally switching off and being awake all night wondering if I’d done everything became a normality. It was only a matter of time before I would break. Contemplating ending my life as a way out was the lowest point I’ve ever been.
It took 10 weeks, before I got back on the horse and returned to any form of work, I have to say the company was incredibly supportive and finally I’m feeling more confident in my return. I won’t say I’m back to my old self, as I never want to be that person again. I’m back, and as much as my company is there for me. I’m different, I’m now me and know that I need to protect myself from falling into the trap that so many of us fall into. It’s just work – A place to exchange time for money so that one day we can be free.
I have to focus on writing again, as I know it helps with my depression and allows me to express how I feel. I will get back to writing about our journey, our travels and adventures. I just felt that I need to explain the very long absence of our blog.
Elena has finally given up her travel job as the pressure in upcoming travel demands is going to be huge. With the world reopening the constant changing of vaccine and quarantine requirements in each country its going to be a mammoth task to keep up with. Some of Elena’s old work colleagues are setting up a help company to assist travel agents with the ever changing health requirements of international travellers. With Elena’s involvement in so many other roles at the moment there is no time to embrace this demanding side of the travel industry, no matter how lucrative the financial side could be.
Since moving home we’ve been renovating, like so many Aussies. Everyone is now waiting for borders to open and the chance to travel once again. We’re experiencing a boom in housing prices and our home city is finally climbing onto the world stage with the announcement of the Olympic games in 2032. We, won’t be selling any time soon, but with the rise in house prices the rental returns are now also showing growth.
Should we decide to travel now, our homes will be paying for themselves and any money we make can now be focused toward our travel – Elena will talk more about this once she gets the finance side of our pages up and running.
Finally we feel we’re getting back on the horse.
